( sniffing )
Ah...
( door opens, Pearl crying )
KRABS: Don't cry, love.
Daddy's going to make it all right.
Calm down, girl!
( Pearl crying louder )
Ah... ( screams )
Mr. Krabs, what's wrong with Pearl?
Her scurvy prom date stood her up, boy,
and now she can't seem to find another.
That's because there's only one fish in the sea
as long, tan and handsome as he is... and that's him!
No, no, baby.
No more crying.
We'll get you a date.
Why, uh... I'll take you.
( starting to cry )
What about Squidward?
( starting to cry )
Wait, wait...
Here, take SpongeBob.
Ah! The fry cook?
Do you know what that would do to my complexion?
People will mistake me for a planetarium.
What do you mean?
I don't know... but I can't take him, Daddy.
They'll kick me off the Most Frequently Pictured in the Yearbook Committee.
Yeah, they would.
We've got to find someone else.
Listen up! Which one of you lucky lubbers wants to take
me lovely daughter Pearl to the prom?
Just don't be late, SpongeBob.
Now listen, boy, I'm a-counting on you
to make this a very special night
for a very special girl.
Remember, you're doing it for good old Mr....
Oh, hi, Mr. Krabs.
Are you talking to that dummy I made?
It's pretty realistic, isn't it?
I made this part out of...
Never mind that, boy!
You're taking Pearl to her prom.
Really? Oh, wow!
Don't worry, Mr. Krabs.
I am a prom expert.
Oh, Gary, I'm a prom failure.
I couldn't even get a date for my own junior prom.
( meows )
No, that was Patrick who brought his mom.
Besides, how am I supposed to compare
with Pearl's old boyfriend
Mr. Long Tan and Handsome?
( meows )
What is it, Gary?
What do you have?
( honking and beeping )
Say, Gary...
this magazine gives me an idea.
Long...
tan...
mmm... handsome.
( boinging )
Okay, Gary, wait till Pearl
gets an eyeful of this!
( boinging )
( doorbell rings )
Hello?
What do you think, Pearl?
Cleans up pretty good, doesn't he?
Well, at least no one will recognize you.
Now, listen, SpongeBob.
l just want to get through this dance
with my social status intact.
I want to go to the prom, get my picture taken,
and I want to dance...
I want to drink punch with my friends,
and don't do that other thing
you're always doing...
Uh, Pearl, we got to get back to the limo.
A limo!
Why didn't you say so?
I love limousines!
Go easy on him, lassie!
I can't afford to break in a new fry cook! Har-har-har...
( rock music playing )
( metal scraping harshly )
CROWD: Ow... ow... ow...!
( music continues, general conversation )
The gym looks wonderful.
Well, I guess the first thing we should do is...
( camera clicks )
Yay, my first prom picture!
Uh... our first prom picture.
Let's get this over with.
Come on, SpongeBob.
Be right there!
( boinging )
Will you hurry up?
Uh... just a second!
( boinging )
Coming...
Sorry...
( boinging )
Here I am...!
Cheese...! Oh!
That will be a keeper.
GIRL: Look, it's Pearl!
Hi, Pearl!
SpongeBob, here come my friends!
Uh... go get me some punch!
Prom expert, away!
( boinging )
GIRLS: Hi, Pearl!
Hi, girls.
I'd like you to meet Billy Fishkins.
Meep.
And you know Brian Flounder
from math class.
Meep.
Hi, Brian.
So... like, where's your date, Pearl?
We're dying to meet him.
He's over at the punch bowl getting me some punch.
Ooh, is he the really tall one?
Oh, yes.
I mean, oh, no...
Ah... eee...
Eee...
Ah... eee...
Ah... eee... ah...
( boinging )
Hup-hup-hup...
Hup-hup-hup-hup...
Hup-hup-hup...
Whoa... oh!
Oh...!
Oh, quick, let's go see how ugly Cindy's dress is.
Thank you. Meep.
Yeah, thanks.
SpongeBob, what are you doing?!
Hi, Pearl!
Come on, it won't bite.
You look ridiculous!
( gasps )
What is it?
Get down, they'll see us!
It's my ex-boyfriend, Octavius Rex,
AKA long, tan and handsome.
Meep.
Whoa... but I bet he isn't holder
of the regional romantic dance championship trophy.
Give me that back.
( laughs ) That didn't just happen.
Let's go!
( rock music playing )
Ready?
SpongeBob, what are you doing?
Can't you see everybody here is doing the whack?
( whacking )
The whack?
Oh, yeah, I invented that one.
Uh... ( boinging )
Are you sure you can do this?
Oh...!
( screams )
( screaming, crashing, clattering... )
Well, I guess you can take me home now.
Now that you've ruined everything... ( crying )
Don't cry... the prom expert is here.
I haven't failed yet...
Hey, we can still... No, I broke that.
I know! We could... no.
Don't cry, don't cry.
Whatever you do, don't...
( crying )
Wow, what did you do to him?
Poor little guy.
( crying )
( screaming )
Sponge, are you okay?
SPONGEBOB ( crying ): Oh... ruined everything. Oh...
Don't worry, SpongeBob... You didn't mess everything up.
( wailing incoherently ): hot dog.
( laughs ) Actually, it was pretty funny
when that hot dog landed in Judy's hair.
( wailing ): good time.
But I am having a good time.
You know, we haven't finished our dance yet.
( mumbling question )
Yes, you can still wear the wig.
Let's go!
SINGER: All right, you invertebrats.
I'm going to teach you how to do the sponge.
♪ Well, if you take your leg and you stick it in the air ♪
♪ And then you take the other one and jam it right up there ♪
♪ You twist yourself around and give a great big lunge ♪
♪ Now you're doing the sponge ♪
♪ Huh, do the sponge, sponge, oh, do the sponge ♪
♪ Bet your buns you're doing the sponge ♪
♪ Well, now, first you take your leg ♪
♪ And you stick it in the air ♪
♪ And then you take the other one ♪
Oh, oh, oh...! ♪ And you jam it right up there... ♪
Meep, meep.
Get lost, pizza topping.
Can't you see I'm doing the sponge?
♪ ...a big lunge ♪
♪ Now you're doing, yeah, now you're doing the sponge ♪
♪ All right now, yeah, do the sponge, sponge ♪
( screaming... ) ♪ Oh, do the sponge ♪
♪ Before you know, you're taking the plunge ♪
♪ I said the sponge, sponge, oh, do the sponge ♪
( siren wailing... ) ♪ Bet your buns you're doing the sponge ♪
♪ Yeah, bet your buns you're doing the sponge ♪
♪ Oh, yeah, well, you're doing the sponge ♪
♪ Oh, I said the sponge, sponge, yeah, do the sponge ♪
( whooping ) ♪ Yeah, do the sponge, sponge... ♪
SPONGEBOB AND PEARL: They love us!
BOTH: Yay, we're popular!
( crowd grumbling )
Go wreck someone else's prom, will you?
Gee whiz, Pearl.
I'm sorry tonight didn't turn out like you planned.
Oh, don't worry, SpongeBob.
I knew it would be a total disaster all along.
But as far as disasters go,
that was really fun.
MR. KRABS: Aha!
Keep away from my precious little flower!
( gasps )
You almost stepped on it.
Oh, Daddy!
Well, goodnight, short, yellow and spongy.
SpongeBob?
Good job, laddie.
( door closes )
Oh, there you are, dummy.
You sure come in handy.
( laughing )